I think most of us see caring for ourselves as just one more thing on our to-do list. And let’s be honest for a second -- it’s usually the first thing dropped when time is limited. Laundry, groceries, chauffeuring kids around, and all of the other tasks of daily life you have to do all take priority. And at the end of a long day, we’re simply too tired. 

I don’t want taking care of yourself to become just another item on your already long list of things to do every day. Frankly, it’s exhausting trying to fit it all in when that’s how you approach self-care. Caring for yourself shouldn’t feel like one more task you have to squeeze into an already full day.

So what if we changed our perspective, just a little, and started looking at caring for ourselves — body, mind, and soul — as a sacred practice?

Could it change from something you have to do into something you actually look forward to doing?

Could taking care of you take priority over your everyday, never ending to do list?

Now, I know things like laundry, groceries, and cleaning still need to get done. But what if they became the secondary tasks instead? What if you found ways to automate some of them, simplify them, or get your family on board with helping?

Would it really matter if the dust sat on your TV stand for one more day? In my world, not taking care of me is far more detrimental in the long run than a little dust on my TV stand.

What if we stopped thinking about caring for ourselves as another collection of things we have to do and started seeing them as sacred acts? Acts of gratitude. Acts of devotion. Acts of unconditional love toward ourselves.

Instead of starting your day by poring over your to-do list, what if you began by choosing one sacred thing you can do today to care for your body, mind, or soul? Then wrote it down. Blocked off time for it. And let the rest of the day fall into place around it.

Go into the woods not because you need to get grounded, but because you love being there. Because being among the trees allows your soul to exhale and your shoulders to relax.
You’ll probably come home grounded either way — but the second perspective warms the heart and lights up the soul a little differently.

Go for a wander in the woods — then tackle the grocery shopping.

Nourish yourself with a wholesome breakfast — then plan some dinners while you leisurely finish your tea. Or better yet, enjoy the entire cup of tea, while it’s still hot, before you start planning anything.

Your kids want to play games after dinner? Guess what? The dishes can wait. Or get everyone involved in a quick tidy-up first. Some amazing — and hilarious — conversations have happened in our house while washing dishes with my kiddos. Either way, games together or dishes together, we are fostering connection. And connection fills my heart with joy.

Sometimes the Ordinary Things Are Sacred Too.

Seeing self-care as sacred doesn’t mean every practice has to involve meditation, candles, crystals, yoga, or wandering barefoot through the forest.

Sometimes sacred self-care looks remarkably ordinary.

Take meal planning ... Planning ten dinners ahead of time becomes much less torturous when I recognize that those thirty minutes are actually caring for myself in several different ways. First, it helps make sure we’re eating nutritious meals, and some yummy lunches as well if I'm lucky enough to snag the leftovers. Second, taking the time to plan allows me to add some variety instead of rotating through the same five dinners over and over again. And third — perhaps most importantly — it means I don’t have to make a dinner decision at 4 p.m. on Wednesday when dinner needs to be prepared, cooked, and eaten before I start work again at 6.

Thirty minutes of planning becomes an act of caring for myself all week long.

Scheduling my sacred self-care for before my other tasks revitalizes me, too.

If I wander in the woods before I go grocery shopping, I know the walk will actually happen. It won’t get lost in the busyness of the day, and I won’t reach the end of everything else too tired to go.

Make Space for What Matters

Another trick for making sure your sacred self-care actually happens?

Auto-booking.

Pre-scheduling things like my acupuncture appointments means they are no longer something I have to somehow 'fit in.' I have intentionally made space for them — every month, for the entire year. And those appointments are non-negotiable for me.

You can also look for ways to make the less-sacred tasks of life a little easier.

Ordering groceries online, for example, can save time — in theory — and frustration if you really don’t love shopping. Personally, online grocery shopping actually adds stress for me, but I know plenty of people who swear by it. For them, it frees up time and energy to care for themselves in ways that feel much more meaningful.

The point isn’t to do things the way someone else does them.

The point is to intentionally create space for the things that nourish you.

So, How Do You Start?

Grab some paper or a notebook and a pen. Sit quietly, place your hands over your heart, and take a deep breath. Then, one at a time, bring to mind the things you already do to care for yourself.

Think about why each one matters to you. How does it care for your body? Your mind? Your soul? What does it allow you to keep doing? How does it make you feel? Then write it down.

Here’s one of mine: I don’t strengthen my muscles simply because exercise is something I’m 'supposed' to do. Strengthening my muscles allows me to continue doing the things I love — hiking mountains and trails — and supports longevity in my career. And it will help me keep doing those things for a long time to come.

Strength training also gives me a quiet space where all I have to think about is the next rep. And, if I’m being completely truthful, there’s something incredibly satisfying about knowing I can lift heavy things. That sense of strength and accomplishment matters too.

Need another example? I don’t just eat food. I nourish my body — and sometimes my soul — with food that is delicious, gives me the energy to do the things I want and need to do, while also providing the nutrients my body needs to be strong and healthy.

Looking at food through the lens of nourishment rather than simply as something you need to eat shifts something. Choosing foods and meals that support you starts to feel less like another obligation and more like an act of care and devotion.

Choose One Sacred Thing

Once you have your list, choose one thing from it that you can prioritize today as a sacred practice of caring for you.

Write it at the top of your planner or stick it somewhere you’ll see it.

Then decide where it fits into your day.

And remember to set yourself up to succeed.

Don’t schedule an hour-long powerlifting class at 7 p.m. if you know you’re not a night owl. And maybe don’t sign yourself up for 6 a.m. yoga if there is absolutely no chance you’ll be awake, dressed, and rolling out the door at that hour.

Sacred does not have to mean difficult -- and it definitely doesn’t mean perfect.

There is no such thing as failure here — only feedback. So, if your day goes sideways and your practice gets lost in the shuffle, that’s okay. Take a deep breath. You can begin again tomorrow.

This is actually why I intentionally use the word practice.

Practice leaves room for you to be human. It leaves room for life to happen, plans to change, and things to occasionally go completely sideways without completely derailing you from your sacred practice. But it also leaves room for you to evolve, experiment, learn, and grow along the way too.

We aren’t aiming for perfection. The intention is simply to consciously choose to see caring for yourself as sacred. To recognize that tending to your body is sacred. Protecting your energy is sacred. Nourishing your mind is sacred. Making space for joy, rest, connection, movement, creativity, and the things that make your soul exhale, is sacred.

And showing up for yourself first will get easier the more you practice. 

In all honesty, I’m not sure I ever want my practice to become perfect. Because perfection would mean there is nothing left to learn, nowhere left to grow, and no new version of myself waiting to be discovered. 
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I’d much rather keep practicing, wouldn't you?

Now, I will tell you that not all of our past vacations have gone smoothly. In fact, there have been a few moments when we found ourselves travelling down some seriously bumpy roads — both literally and figuratively. But really, does any trip ever go perfectly according to plan? And maybe that’s exactly why intention matters most.

Because if you set the intention of having a perfectly curated, Instagram-worthy vacation, what happens when it pours rain, plans go sideways, locations are closed for the season, and everyone gets just a little too much together time? Chances are, you’re going to end up disappointed and likely even a little irritated with your travel companions.

So, for the first time ever I chose to set an intention for our trip. 

My intention wasn’t about deciding exactly minute by minute how I want the trip to unfold. It was about deciding how I wanted to move through my vacation and how I wanted it to feel in the end — even when it unfolded differently than I imagined.

I decided to set a more generalized intention for this trip, with the aim to avoid disappointment and irritation returning home with me. My impression of the trip would no longer be tied to everyone enjoying themselves, or everyone getting along and being happy, or how successful we were at checking things off our list, or how excited people were about things I wanted to see, or had found to do, or making sure that there was something for everyone to experience. It created space for people to be in a bad mood, or be tired, or hangry, or need a little time to themselves, or to choose not to go on an adventure.

Really my intention created space for us to be human. And anything that happened beyond my intention was either icing on the cake or had no bearing on the experience.  

​And let me tell you, that it made a huge difference! 

​What was my intention?

And guess what ... that's exactly what happened. But also so much more! 

We didn’t always do things together or agree on what we should do — and we certainly didn’t completely escape the occasional irritation. But we did stand in awe together, completely out of breath with our legs burning, at the end of a ridiculously hard 0.8 km hike to a waterfall and then again to a mountain lake viewpoint. We hiked a mountain, 10km one way, going up 580m in elevation to the lookout near the top together. We cracked up laughing together at my nine-year-old niece’s tour guide commentary over the walkie-talkies. We ran together to capture the mountain reflections on a calm turquoise lake. We tested the icy waters of glacier runoff together. We played Canasta together, collected stones together, and sat quietly by the fire in the evenings together.

It wasn’t about doing everything together as a group of 11 + 1 dog. It was about being present enough to recognize the moments we experienced, whether it was 3, 6, 9, or 11 of us together on an adventure — and then sharing or reminiscing with the rest of the group over dinner.

​Setting the intention the way I did, almost made our vacation fool proof. The weather didn't matter, what we did didn't matter, who we did it with didn't matter — because it was all time spent in the mountains and tall trees with my sister, parents, and a few other crazies, and nothing could take away from that.

So before your next vacation, maybe spend a little less time thinking about how you want everything to go and a little more time thinking about how you want to feel while you’re there.

What do you want to bring with you? More presence? More connection? More laughter? A little more patience when everyone has spent way too much time together?

Set an intention for the trip — not as another expectation it has to live up to, but as something you can come back to when the plans change, the rain starts, someone gets cranky, or the ridiculously short hike turns out to be ridiculously hard.

Because intention won’t make your vacation perfect. It can, however, remind you to notice what’s happening in between all those imperfect moments — the laughter over the walkie-talkies, the race to catch a reflection on the lake, the stones tucked into your pockets, and the quiet evenings around the fire.
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And sometimes, those are the moments you end up bringing home with you.

That 30 minutes of reading has found to be just as effective as yoga at lowering blood pressure, heart rate and feelings of psychological distress!

Or that reading increases brain connectivity both during active reading and for days after ... the brain literally lights up with activity when viewed under an MRI during reading.

Would you run and grab something to read or would you need a little more convincing?

Here is more research that I found to support reading being good for your health ...

• a 2009 study found that reading reduces stress levels by 68%, making it more effective than taking a walk (42%) or drinking a cup of tea (54%) ... now imagine what would happen if you drank a cup of tea while reading?!?!
• another study from 2013 found that reading literary fiction elevated levels of empathy
• it can boost brain power, increase general knowledge
• reading helps improve memory ... as you remember character names, their nature and their place in the story your brain is creating new pathways and synapses with every knew memory
• studies have found that people who engage in mentally stimulating activities, like reading, all their lives are less likely to develop age-related cognitive decline.
• it can be motivating and inspiring as well as an escape from your reality
• reading can be a part of a healthy bedtime routine for some people (some of us have a hard time putting a book down when we get sucked in lol)

Now, if you are at all like me, that first line already had you running for the nearest book and hollering to your family that you were taking a wellness break and are not to be disturbed ... although if you are really really like me, you probably already had a book or two sitting right beside you ready to go lol.

For the rest of you ... The answer is simple ...

Read anything and everything you can get your hands on!

Mix it up between fiction and non-fiction (but stay the heck away from the news ... that shits depressing).

Try something motivational or life changing.

Step out of your comfort zone and try a new genre ... or a subcategory of your favourite genre.

Pull out your old favourites, or a new book from your favourite author.

Find something with a little sizzle (or a lot - thanks to RHD for that awesome word hahaha), some suspense, or action, or adventure ... something set in your favourite location ... something that teaches you something fun.

Ask friends for recommendations and give them a try ... even if they aren't the typical books you read you never know what amazing world you might stumble across.

Try the website whatshouldireadnext.com for suggestions based on a book you loved.

Check out your local library.

Sign up for bookbub.com and get emails once a day or once a week highlighting e-books that are being offered for free or sale from the publishers and accessible though your favourite book reading apps. You get to pick the genres and subcategories that you see offers for.

Joy is defined as a feeling of great pleasure and happiness according to google and Oxford Languages.

Seems simple enough, right?!?!?!

But sometimes, somewhere along the road we seem to lose sight of what brings us Joy and we end up just surviving.

We end up bogged down in work, and schedules, and housework (even just with the essentials and not the dark corners where the dust bunnies multiply), and kids, and earning extra money to afford the next big trip, and holidays, and family obligations, and, and, and ... and we long for the next weekend even though it is only Monday, or the next day off, simply because we didn't make time to prioritize what brings us Joy, what fuels us, what lights us up, what energizes us.

So how do we break this nasty cycle you ask?

​We bring back Joy, and Pleasure, and Happiness.

We prioritize it every single day! 

Even if that means sitting in a kitchen full of dirty dishes and recycling to write a blog post (yep you guessed it, that's me right now because writing blogs brings me joy).

Having trouble getting started? Here are some of the things on my Joy list, just to get you thinking ...

One of the other major things that I do is surround myself with actual printed photos ... of my favourite places, of my people in my favourite places, of a moment that just filled my heart till it was so full it was leaking out my eyes. My walls are full of both photographs and my art so that when I shift my gaze around any room I always land on something or someone that brings me joy or a joyful memory.

So print those photos you have stored on your phone, or the ones on your computer ... frame them and display them ... and then when your gaze lands on them, close your eyes, bring the memory to the surface and watch the scene like its from your favourite movie, and go back to it over and over again any time you need a little reminder that there is Love & Joy all around us ... we just have to choose to see it.

I think that we can all learn from each other, and sharing our journeys towards choosing Joy is the best place to start!

​So, share your adventures towards finding Joy again! 

Show us what brings you Joy!

​Be Joyful & Well!

In the week leading up to the most craziest storm I think I have ever seen, I had been craving a quiet escape ... so much so that I had even contemplated seeing if I could convince my family to go camping for night at the end of May.

In the aftermath of the storm, once we knew it would be days not hours until power was restored, the kids and I quickly pivoted. Flashlights were collected and placed on the kitchen table, camp stove and pots dug out of the equipment buckets in the basement, propane tank picked up from Grandma and Grandpa, and cooler filled with ice jugs and anything from the fridge we thought we might need.

Then the most amazing thing happened ... we became Urban Campers for 2.5 days!

We did all of the camping things that I love like quietly reading books together, we played games together, went for walks everyday together, cooked on our beloved camp stove (the BBQ and I don't see eye to eye lmao, give me a camp stove any day), cooperatively did the dishes after every meal, and we visited the best comfort station EVER for hot hot showers (aka grandma & grandpas).

We had FUN despite the chaos and panic around us.

I knew without a doubt that they were working as hard and as fast as they could to restore the power ... and that it would all be okay in the end.

I was not stressed.

I simply enjoyed the quiet that no hydro brought and the disconnect from everything (no cell service will do that).

Now I know that not everyone had a blissful weekend like we did.

My husband was super busy at work (he's a paramedic). All of the essential people worked really hard to keep us safe from downed wires, cleared trees, and help anyone injured during the storm. And some of you who I have chatted with since the long weekend found their stress ramped up.

Maybe we can take some lessons from camping to heart and apply them to life and any future adventures the environment might through our way ...

... preparation is key ... whatever will be will be ... the weather is always unpredictable ... working together makes things better and often faster ... nature is healing, grounding, and soothing ... being disconnected periodically is actually good for your health and wellbeing ... slow down and enjoy the moments ... making memories doesn't have to be expensive ... your won't melt if you get caught in a downpour ... regular exercise and moving of your body is key ... as is sleep ... and everyone loves a good board game!

Embrace the here and now, the present moment, and be mindful always.

I hope that you are inspired to take a different view on your own experience during the power outage & find some beautiful memories there.

I know I plan to bring back some no tech game nights to our house in the future, and am looking forward to sleeping in an actual tent the next time we camp. 

(Below are a sampling of photos from our urban camping adventures.)

​Be Well!

2.5 days Urban camping, May long weekend 2022 ...

And then we did it again for another day and a half the following weekend, lol.